Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Hall of Shame: Malaysian Moto GP & Mat Rempit

Just out of curiousity today, I did a search for "stupid" on Youtube, mostly out of curiousity for whether Ms South Carolina* is still there in the top 5 or if Palin managed to dislodge her. I wasn't all that surprised to find, at last, yet another reason why I don't readily identify myself as being Malaysian:

See, this is why we can't have nice things. Click the video to get to the Youtube page and marvel at the human zoo that is the Comments tab.

Of course, it doesn't help that Malaysia is home to Mat Rempit culture. Not familiar with the term? I will break it down for you.

Mat Rempit is a term used to identify what passes as a bike ganger in this country. However, their budgets are significantly tighter. As such, they do not ride anything like this:

... or this:

... or even this:

... but this:

The mark of the Rempit. Technically called an underbone, though I find 'moped' slides off the tongue easier and isn't too far off. And it's on these piddly little machines, with about the same engine power as a lawn mower, that the Mat Rempit lives out his racing fantasies on the many, many highways criss-crossing Malaysia. Most of them aren't even literate enough to read this blog. It's a quite pathetic, really. Or it would be pathetic, were it not for the fact that these moped-mounted morons are quite heavily involved in gangsterism, theft, vandalism, rape and all the other hallmarks of misguided, uneducated, idle youth.

Having only a medieval, paedophile-worshipping religion for moral guidance doesn't help. Neither do MPs who've decided if you can't beat them, make them heroes. Add into the equation an underpaid police force with NO cojones and an utterly uninspired local film industry with nothing else better to do than actually romanticise the Mat Rempit lifestyle, and you've pretty much cooked up a malignant tumour in Malaysian society. I hope you're proud of yourselves, you bastards.

That having been said, I really like Kelantan's proposed approach to dealing with them, that is, to build them a nice track and let them do their racing there. It's great! Then they can wipe themselves out in their own little track in a controlled, legal manner - far, far away from the rest of us. Rock on! So good luck to Kelantan and props to Datuk Nik Abdul Aziz Nik Mat (who will be referred to as Niknik in this blog for ever after) for some good lateral thinking.

Among the many things on my present To Do list is looking for another country for me and Haruka to move to. Permanently.

* Just found this most excellent breakdown by Jimmy Kemmel. Take a peep to get a closer look at the little miss' interesting approach to grammar.

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