Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Shock! Horror! Eh?

I just laughed when I saw this. Long story short, if you cannae be arsed to clicky the link:

- Malaysians suck in bed. No, not literally! I mean, Malaysians can't get no satisfaction. 2 out of 3 men and 3 out of 4 women are dissatisfied with their sex lives, apparently, placing them number 6 of 13 countries surveyed in the Asia-Pacific Sexual Health and Overall Wellness Survey, conducted by Pfizer.

- Singaporeans are even worse off, at number 8. Nya, nya, nyaaaa...

This didn't strike me as terribly surprising, seeing as the general impression one gets of the two countries is that Malaysia bears the unfortunate taint of widespread theistic religion, bringing with it the usual intellectual consequences and, of course, sexual repression. And Singapore, hell, everyone knows Singaporeans are generally too stressed out trying to earn moar money to enjoy some sweet lovin'.

What really surprised me was who was at the bottom - Japan! JAPAN?! zomg wtf r u kidding me?? From the country that brought us THE most diabolical pornography on this side of the planet? The same people who regularly redefine Rule 34 with every new manga? The nation that tried* to outdo 2 Girls 1 Cup? Where you can hire a woman of negotiable affection dressed up as Hello Kitty? Where you can take a train ride through THIS?

You know what I'm thinking? I'm thinking it's like... wasabi.

At first you take a little, then you get used to it, so you take a little more... Then by the time you're say, 50, you've got to check underneath your wasabi to make sure the sushi's still there. Same thing with Japan and sex. They've been so open and had so much of it that what it takes to satisfy them defies normal human imagination. Well, that's the closest thing to an explanation I can come up with.

If anyone out there comes up with something better, I'm willing to hear it. For now, my cats are in dire need of a bath...

* And succeeded. I really shouldn't bring up something like this just after having lunch. Don't ask me for details.

1 comment:

Rambling Alcoholic said...

Do u know, that there is a phenomenon in Japan now, where men cannot "finish" in a woman and need to jerk to "completion"?

Its true, go google.

They are blaming it for the low birth rate. Its cause? Having watched too much pron.

There we have it. You can have too much of a good thing. Haha.